Thoughts on Having a Second Child

Photo by Rachel Walker. From

Recently my husband and I had the talk about if we should start trying to conceive a second child.  People have started to get nosy and ask if we are trying or say comments like, “Abby needs a little brother,” or “You should start soon!”  We’ve waited the obligatory eighteen months that my obstetrician advised us to wait after my emergency C-section.  We haven’t officially started to try to get pregnant, but we haven’t tried not to either, figuring it will happen when it happens. 

The subject hasn’t been far from my mind.  Here’s a list of what I have been thinking about.

  • I feel kind of sorry that #2 won’t get all the one-on-one attention that Abby has had for the as year and a half.  I also feel kind of sorry for Abby that she will have to adjust to sharing Mommy and Daddy with someone else.  I know it will happen eventually, but I feel bad rocking her little world.
  • I recently started a medication that made me feel constantly nauseous for a week.  I am not ready for the morning sickness period of pregnancy.  I had it for months.
  • I was hoping to be in better shape the second time around.  I wanted to work on gaining strength in my core, arms, and legs. Standing and rocking Abby for hours on end was brutal.  She never liked rocking in the glider and always wanted me to stand and rock her.
  • Abby is just now starting to sleep through the night or only wake up once.  Yes!  The thought of pregnancy insomnia and sleep deprivation from taking care of a newborn is a hard pill to swallow.
  • Can we afford a second kid?  Doctor visits, diapers, daycare… kids are so expensive!
  • Will Abby be jealous of #2?  I remember being excited when my mom was pregnant.  I wanted a sister to play with… then she arrived and was small, stinky, noisy, and took all my mom’s attention.  I wanted to send her back but Mom said we couldn’t.   I cut all the hair off of my Fraggle doll, Wembley, and got in trouble.
  • I dread telling my boss and coworkers when it is time to announce that I am pregnant, mostly because of the timing.  We are working on an intense year long project that I would (depending on timing) miss the last quarter or end of.  I feel bad because of the possibility of throwing more of my work onto my coworkers.
  • Because of this work project I will be required to put in a lot of extra work and overtime hours.  That is totally going to suck when I am pregnant, exhausted, and chasing a toddler around at home.
  • Will we be able to keep our current daycare provider?  Abby loves her and has never gone anywhere else.  I don’t want to switch to someone I don’t know if she doesn’t have an opening when it is time for me to go back to work after maternity leave.
  • I can’t wait to be pregnant again.  Aside from the morning sickness I loved just about every moment of being pregnant the first time.
  • I can’t wait for little baby snuggles… the new baby smell… new baby sounds… ahh….
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