I just want to sleeeeeeeeep
Abby doesn’t sleep very well yet; I wake up with her multiple times a night. Sometimes she wants to eat, sometimes it is a dirty diaper, other times she just wants cuddles. I hate to say it but sometimes about the fifth or sixth time I start to get a little grumpy. Seriously, we’re getting up again? This is really getting old.
Since she has had a cold this week she has wanted to be held a lot of the night. I’ve been very adamant that we not start a habit of co-sleeping in bed, so we’ve been cuddling together on the couch. My back and neck are all out of whack and I feel uncomfortable all night long. I don’t blame her though. I’m sure she doesn’t feel well, she wants comfort, she wants snuggles.
But all of my tired grumpiness instantly dissolves when I walk into her bedroom and see her sweet little face barely peeping over the crib rail. I pick her up and she rubs her little head on my shoulder and her hands go around my neck. A little hand reaches up and holds on to my earlobe, something she has done since she began nursing.
She is so little and fits so well in my arms. Her fuzzy, downy hair is so soft and fine and tickles my nose. She smells so good and I could breathe in the scent of her forever. I know some day I will miss it when it is gone.
She needs her mommy and I am happy to wake up to comfort her. I wish I could have the power to solve all her problems with cuddles for the rest of her life, but I know that I won’t be able to… so for now, at least, I am going to enjoy every minute of this while I can.