How to Drive Mom Crazy in 10 Easy Steps: the Morning Edition

Hey kids, looking for something fun to do? Bored with the same old morning routine? Are you a precocious two-year-old? Try this kid-tested way to shake up your morning and get the day started right!

1. Refuse to answer Mom when she asks what you want for breakfast five times, then, when she sits down to eat start to whine because you are hungry.

2. After Mom gives you breakfast, cry because it is too hot/cold/the wrong flavor/not what you want.

3. Sit and pout because the Paw Patrol shirt you wanted to wear isn’t what Mom picked out. When Mom brings you the Paw Patrol shirt, run away and hide because you want to wear your Moana nightgown all day instead.

4. When Mom is stepping into the shower, bring her a Frozen sticker and insist that she put it on immediately. Argue when she explains that it will get wet in the shower.

5. After Mom begins to shower, whine to her that you are still hungry. When she asks if you ate your breakfast tell her “No, it’s gross.” Sneakily try to get into Mom’s makeup and unroll the toilet paper when she isn’t watching.

6. Help pick out shoes for Mom to wear to work. Double points if they don’t match and extra points if you slam the bedroom door because she doesn’t wear them.

7. Say, “Mommy, I love you so much. Sorry I’ve had a rough morning. I am tired.” Give her a hug. After her back is turned, take off all of your clothes except for one sock.

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8. Run away when you are told to get dressed. Cry when you Mom says everyone is going to be late. As Mom puts your clothes back on, tell her you are hungry again.

9. Steal a toy from the baby.

10. Insist on climbing into your car seat by yourself and run away when Mom tries to pick you up. Thrash around like a madman while Mom is trying to buckle the straps. Yell because the straps are too tight and you are hungry.


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