My little man has just turned one. It is hard to believe that we have been a family of four for that long.
Changing from a family of three to a family of four was harder than changing from a family of two to a family of three. All our routines were upended. In the process, mommy’s girl turned into a daddy’s girl, and I can’t say that didn’t wrench my heart a little bit.
Last night we were looking at photos of when Abby was small and it was so hard to picture life before Oscar. His presence has filled a place I didn’t even know was empty and has forever changed me.
Growing up, I had never wanted a boy. I never imagined having a son and always had girl “babies” when playing house. I am not sure why, but it is probably because my younger sister and I were the only kids in the house and my mom was one of seven girls in her family. The only cousins I was close to were girls.
Everything changed when the ultrasound technician said, “It’s a boy!” Now, the little guy has stolen my heart. He is the happiest, snuggliest, cutest boy I have seen. Oscar is calm, easygoing, and good natured. He is extremely well behaved and easy to care for, even when he doesn’t feel well. He adores his big sister, and even though she has recently started to act jealous of the attention he gets, she adores him, as well.
Last night I lay on the couch with him as I tried to put him to sleep. In the past week he has been teething and is just getting over a cold, so he has been waking multiple times during the night. He snuggled up close to me and held a fistful of my hair while snoring softly in my ear. I kissed his soft cheek and breathed in his sweet scent thinking, this must be what Heaven feels like, or at least, I hope so. Nothing could have been better in that moment.
I loved my family and life before his arrival, but now I can’t imagine a life without my Oscar.